Reverse Aging: How I Stay Youthful Despite 40 Years of Depression and Grief

Reverse Aging: How I Stay Youthful Despite 40 Years of Depression and Grief

“You can’t be 61 – you don’t look it!” It’s something I hear more often than I ever imagined. And while I’m flattered, I know they’re seeing something deeper. It’s not about my skincare routine (I use only organic products from my kitchen). There’s no secret serum or elusive routine. What they’re seeing is the glow of a life lived with love, presence, and a quiet commitment to staying light, no matter the age. It’s the energy I give off. And this energy wasn’t born in comfort.

It was built slowly, deliberately, in the middle of grief, loss, and 40 years of living with clinical depression. My journey with depression began as postnatal depression in my 20s and quietly became a lifelong companion. Some days felt impossible. Others, manageable. But through every season, I held tight to the values my father-my idol and eternal rock star-instilled in me. His lessons didn’t just help me survive. They’ve helped me shine. Aging can, in many ways, be reversed-not on the outside, but from within. Here’s how I’ve Reverse Aging: How I Stay Youthful Despite 40 Years of Depression and Grief.

1. I Carried My Father’s Light When Mine Felt Dim

My father’s words echo in my life daily. “Never cheat, do good, and good will come to you.” He lived that truth, and so have I. Even during the lowest points in my mental health journey, I held onto his values like a life raft. Kindness. Integrity. Humility. Joy. Those values became my strength when mine ran out. He taught me that age is just a number, but the energy we radiate, how we treat others, and how we choose to show up every day is what keeps us young. With a twinkle in his eye and chocolates in his pocket, he spread smiles everywhere he went. Children would run up to him just for that little piece of sweetness, and in return, he would receive a heart full of joy.

2. I Turned My Grief Into Growth

Loss changes you. But I’ve chosen to let it shape me, not harden me. Grief softened my edges, made me more empathetic, and gave me depth. It also taught me that emotional strength is the true youth serum– it lifts your spirit, your posture, and your presence.

Life has thrown some curveballs my way. But I’ve learned to bounce back. I don’t cling to bruises. I don’t hold grudges. I let go of what I cannot control and pour love into what I can. There’s a quiet power in resilience- a strength that softens your edges and gives you grace.

3. I Still Laugh — Loudly, Often, and Without a Filter

If joy is rebellion, then I am a quiet rebel. Even in my darkest moments, I find reasons to laugh- sometimes through tears. And that laughter has healed parts of me that no therapy ever could. It’s laughter that bubbles up easily and a spirit that hasn’t been dulled by the weight of years but polished gently by experience. It’s also excellent for your face – I highly recommend laugh lines over frown lines.

I talk things out. I don’t bottle up my emotions anymore because I’ve learned that holding on builds tension in your body, skin,  and spirit. Expression is liberation. It’s emotional detox. And it shows. People often mistake emotional clarity for a glow-up. It is.

4. I Lean Into Curiosity

One of the greatest tools in my anti-aging arsenal? Curiosity. I’ve never stopped learning. Whether it is experimenting with a new recipe, discovering a podcast, or sitting cross-legged on the floor with my grandsons Arian and Amir as they show me the latest in their world, I stay open. A curious mind keeps you young: mentally, emotionally, and even physically.

I believe the moment you stop being curious, you start aging in ways no cream can reverse. Whether it’s writing, learning from Gen Z slang, or just asking, “Why not?”- I use terms like- Ghosting, Lit, Bussin, Drip, GOAT and so on.I keep my mind alive and playful. I look up every word I read or hear if I dont know the meaning. I check the pronunciation as well. Curiosity keeps your brain young and your spirit agile. I play Scrabble and other word games online, and solve crossword puzzles. Keeping in tune with current affairs and whatever is the latest, be it fashion or food. It helps me reinvent myself over and over again.

5. I’m Open About My Struggles — It Keeps Me Free

I don’t hide my depression. I’ve written about Postpartum Depression, shared it, and allowed it to become part of my story – not the whole story, but a chapter I no longer carry with shame. This openness has brought me unexpected healing and profound connection. When I speak my truth, others feel safe to speak theirs too. And in being vulnerable, I’ve discovered a quiet kind of strength – one that doesn’t roar but stands tall. I don’t shy away from seeking help, whether it’s therapy, yoga, prayer, a walk in the garden, or simply talking to someone who truly listens. I try any and every way to feel better because I believe healing is not linear – it’s a lifelong conversation with myself. And that conversation, when honest, sets me free. This openness has brought me healing and connection.

6. The Company You Keep

My father always said, “If you want to stay young, be around young people.” And he lived that truth. Even in his eighties, he sought the company of vibrant minds and open hearts. I do the same. I gravitate towards those who are lively, joyful, and authentic. I avoid energy vampires. If someone dims your light, it’s okay to walk away. Positive energy is contagious: it reflects in your skin, your aura, your vibe.

Good people. Home-cooked food. Music. Family. Children’s laughter. These things matter. I’ve trimmed out what drains me and held tight to what fills me. My dad always said, “Keep your people happy. The rest will follow.” And it’s true.

7. I Keep Joy Circulating (Yes, There’s Still Something Sweet in My Bag)

My father had a simple, beautiful habit — he always carried chocolates in his pocket for children. He believed a smile was the best gift you could give, and chocolate was just the delivery system. This simple act- sharing chocolates- wasn’t just about treats. It was about connection. Love. Presence

I carried on that tradition for years. But these days, many parents prefer to skip the sugar (understandably so.. No one wants a post-chocolate chaos session!). So now, I’ve adapted: I keep something fun in my bag – a cute toy, fancy stationery or a little surprise – to spark joy and wonder in a child’s eyes. And yes, there’s still a chocolate or two tucked away.

My daughter Esha has picked up the baton too, continuing the circle of sweetness and smiles. We’ve turned it into a little family ritual- our way of spreading light, one small gesture at a time. Because sharing joy, in any form, keeps your heart young. It connects generations. And it reminds you that no matter your age, you can always bring magic into someone’s day.

8. I Don’t Wait for Big Moments to Celebrate

I buy flowers for no reason. I paint my nails on a random Tuesday. I light candles at dinner, even when I’m dining alone. Life has taught me that celebration isn’t reserved for grand milestones; it’s in the everyday magic: A good cup of chamomile tea, a sunny morning, an unexpected compliment. I don’t do these things for Instagram or approval. I do them for my soul. These tiny rituals remind me to keep choosing joy, to honour the moment I’m in, and to create beauty simply because I can. They’re my way of saying, “Yes, life — I see you, and I’m grateful.”

9. I Live Like I’m Becoming, Not Declining

Society treats aging like a slow fade, a retreat from relevance. But I don’t see it that way. I see aging as a becoming – a shedding of pretence, a deeper knowing of who I am and what truly matters. With every passing year, I feel more real, more raw, and more radiant in my quiet way. I don’t chase youth; I nurture it from within. Through curiosity, presence, and purpose. Through staying playful yet grounded. I’m not losing anything, I’m gaining layers of richness, wisdom, and authenticity. And that, to me, is the most beautiful kind of growth.

10. I Wake Up Grateful That I Woke Up At All

Every morning, I wake up with a purpose. Whether it’s a new blog post, designing a space with heart, or spreading a dosa with love, I do it with intention. That fire inside? It’s the real anti-aging magic. Passion lights up your face, keeps your eyes bright, and your movements spirited.

There were days I didn’t want to get out of bed. I remember them clearly. So now, every morning I wake up with a little more grace in my bones and gratitude in my breath. That’s youth. That’s life.

🌱 The Real Secret to Reverse Aging

It’s not about turning back the clock. It’s about living like your soul is expanding.

It’s about learning to dance with your shadows and still choosing the light. It’s about aging into freedom, into fullness, into your true self.

So no, I’m not 61 years old.
I am 61 years resilient.
61 years expressive.
61 years joyfully, defiantly, alive!

I am participating in #BLOGCHATTERA2Z YEAR 2025 &  Blogging from A to Z Challenge!

The A2Z List

1. Awakening-Ignite your Spark
2. Bloom Bravely-Choose Courage & Self-love
3. Clear Mental Clutter for Growth
4. Rise with Determination
5. 8 Steps to Embracing Your True Essence
6. Finding Work-life Balance
7. Gratitude: Fuelling Growth with Thankfulness
8. Healing: Turning My Power into Pain
9. Inner strength: Awakening the warrior within
10. Joyful Living: Creating a Life of Joy & Purpose
11. Kindness to Myself & Others
12. Letting Go: Making Space for Peace
13. Mindfulness Matters: Breath by Breath
14. Nurturing Yourself:Effective self care strategies
15. Overcoming Obstacles: From Grief to Growth
16. Passion & Purpose in Life After Loss