Years That Shaped Me

If I were given the chance to live life all over again, I wouldn’t change a thing. Not because everything went well—it didn’t. But because every twist and turn, every loss and low, revealed parts of me I didn’t know existed. I met strength I hadn’t seen. I met me. These Years That Shaped Me didn’t just pass—they carved me.

What Life Demanded, I Became

I didn’t ask to be tested. Life didn’t wait for permission. It threw its weight in the form of early motherhood, undiagnosed postnatal depression, a husband’s sudden passing, a son taken too soon, a spinal fusion that stopped everything in its tracks—and the invisible war of battling anxiety and isolation, day after day.

There was no map, no mentor, no manual. But I still found my way. I taught myself how to earn, how to protect my children, how to hold my dignity in rooms that tried to strip it away. I learned how to stand alone, when those around me expected me to fall.

Not Just Survival—Self-Definition

People talk about survival as if it’s enough. But what I built went beyond that. I crafted a life that reflected my values—independence, respect, and integrity. I walked away from places that didn’t honour those. I changed jobs, shifted gears, and started from scratch more times than I can count.

From unpaid writing gigs to launching a homestay, from personality development classes to freelance gigs, I hustled in every sense of the word. Not for applause—but to stay afloat with grace.

One Spine. Infinite Strength.

My spinal fusion forced a full stop. No career. No income. Just stillness. And the silence was brutal. But somehow, even lying on my back, staring at the ceiling, I found a way forward. I didn’t collapse. I created. I opened my home to guests and found a livelihood in hospitality. Not fancy, but mine.

Even now, I walk 4 kilometres a day. I practice yoga under the rising sun. I quiet the noise through breathing, tapping, meditation—whatever it takes to stay grounded.

More Than Survival

These weren’t just years spent surviving. They were years of choosing not to be bitter. Of learning to create something meaningful from what remained. Of refusing to let pain write my ending.

These Years Taught Me:

Over the years, a few truths became anchors:

• You’re stronger than your worst day. The worst passed. You didn’t.
• Earning your peace sometimes means letting people go. Not everyone deserves a front-row seat.
• Dignity matters more than being right. Walk away with your self-respect intact. Always.
• Grief rewrites your life, but it doesn’t erase you. It becomes part of the story—not the whole of it.
• Healing isn’t a straight line—it’s a practice. Some days you’ll break again. You just learn to rebuild faster.
• Resilience is a decision. One you make every morning, whether you feel like it or not.
• Loss never leaves—but it doesn’t have to break you. It can become part of your strength.
• Self-respect isn’t loud, but it’s unshakable. And it’s non-negotiable.
• People will misunderstand you. Let them. Your story isn’t for their approval.
• You don’t need to prove your worth. Just live it.

No Romanticism, Just Reality

I don’t glamorize the past. Some parts still sting. But I carry them differently now. They aren’t weights—I’ve turned them into wings. My writing, my voice, my presence—they’re all shaped by what I’ve lived through. And I wouldn’t trade that.

What I Know Now

Grief doesn’t end. Healing isn’t linear. But peace? Peace is possible. And joy—it sneaks in, even during the messiest seasons. A cup of chai, a message from a friend, the sight of a peacock on a morning walk. Small things. Real things.

And courage? It’s not about being fearless. It’s about being afraid and showing up anyway.

I am participating in #BLOGCHATTERA2Z YEAR 2025 &  Blogging from A to Z Challenge!

The A2Z List

1. Awakening-Ignite your Spark
2. Bloom Bravely-Choose Courage & Self-love
3. Clear Mental Clutter for Growth
4. Rise with Determination
5. 8 Steps to Embracing Your True Essence
6. Finding Work-life Balance
7. Gratitude: Fuelling Growth with Thankfulness
8. Healing: Turning My Power into Pain
9. Inner strength: Awakening the warrior within
10. Joyful Living: Creating a Life of Joy & Purpose
11. Kindness to Myself & Others
12. Letting Go: Making Space for Peace
13. Mindfulness Matters: Breath by Breath
14. Nurturing Yourself:Effective self care strategies
15. Overcoming Obstacles: From Grief to Growth
16. Passion & Purpose in Life After Loss
17. Quiet Moments for Inner Strength
18. Reverse Aging: How I stay youthful despite 40 years of depression and grief
19. Self Discovery-Mapping my Unique Path
20. Transformation: Embracing Change for Growth
21. Unfiltered and unapologetic
22. Victory in The Everyday
23. Woven with Grace